Arrows Move Toward Stress - Move Away From Non-Stress

The idea that must be remembered here is a person is not one personality type, but a core type fluctuating between two others, one in stress, the other in non-stress. So each person is continuously traveling between three points, one of them being the core, while at the same time, this person may or may not lean towards one of it's wing points. To repeat, it is a core point fluctuating between two other points, towards one in stress, towards the other in security, while some are heavily influenced by one of its wing points. A Five for instance, is secure in eight, but when stress hits it goes towards seven in order to secure its core of Five, like a rubber band effect. I am a fiveish four, or a four-Tragic Romantic, who acts as a withdrawing observer, from leaning in my wing point as a Five-Observer-Solitude. As a Four, I fall into the secure point of a One-Perfectionist. So under stress, I move towards a Two-Giver, in order to balance out my Four.

A five for instance, is secure in eight, but when stress hits it goes towards seven in order to secure its desire of being an eight. I am a fiveish four, or a four-Tragic Romantic, who withdraws in my wing point as a Five-Observer-Solitude. As a Four, I have the secure point or desire to be a One-Perfectionist. So under stress, I move towards a Two-Giver, in order to obtain my secure point of the One-Perfectionist secure point.

The meeting points of two people are at their prospective core points, wings and stress and secure points. For instance a Six and Eight can meet at Five, Six, Seven and Nine.

From The Enneagram, by Helen Palmer

1. The Perfectionist - Critical of self and others. Convinced there is one correct way. Feel ethically superior. Procrastinate for fear of making a mistake. Use should and must a lot.

2. The Giver or Supporter - Demand affection and approval. Seek to be loved and appreciated by becoming indispensable to another person. Devoted to meeting other'needs. Manipulative. Have many selves - show a different self to each good friend. Aggressively seductive. Evolved Twos are genuinely caring and supportive. The Jewish mother syndrome.

3. The Performer or Achiever - Seek to be loved for performance and achievement. Competitive. Obsessed with image as a winner and with comparative status. Masters at appearances. Type A personalities. Confuse real self and job identity. Can appear to be more productive than actually are. Evolved Threes can be effective leaders, good packagers, competent promoters, captains of winning teams.

4. The Tragic Romantic - Attracted to the unavailable; ideal is never here and now. Tragic, sad, artistic, sensitive; focused on the absent lover, the loss of a friend. Evolved Fours are creative in their way of life and able to help other people through their pain. They are committed to beauty and the passionate life: birth, sex, intensity, and death.

5. The Observer - Maintain emotional distance from others. Protect privacy, don't get involved. Doing without is a defense against involvement. Feel drained by commitment and by other people's needs. Compartmentalized obligations; detached from people, feelings, and things. Evolved Fives can be excellent decision makers, ivory-tower intellectuals, and abstemious monks.

6. The Devil's Advocate - Fearful, dutiful, plagued by doubt. Procrastination - thinking replaces doing - afraid to take action because exposure leads to attack. Identify with underdog causes, antiauthoritarian, self-sacrificing, loyal to the cause. The phobic Sixes vacillate, feel persecuted, and cave in when cornered. The counterphobic Sixes feel perpetually cornered and therefore go out to confront the terror in an aggressive way. Evolved Sixes can be great team players, loyal soldiers, and good friends. Will work for a cause in the way that others work for personal profit.

7. The Epicure - Peter Pan, puer aeternus - the eternal youth. Dilettantish, dance-away lovers, superficial, adventurous, gourmet approach to life. Trouble with commitment, want to keep the options open, want to stay emotionally high. Generally happy, stimulating to be around, habit of starting things but not seeing them through. Evolved Sevens are good synthesizers, theoreticians, Renaissance types.

8. The Boss - Extremely protective. Stick up for self and friends; combative, take charge, love a fight. Have to be in control. Open displays of anger and force; great respect for opponents who will stand and fight. Make contact through sex and toe-to-toe confrontations. Excessive way of life: too much, too late at night, too loud. Evolved Eights are excellent leaders, especially in the adversarial role. Can be powerful supporters for other people; want to make the way safe for friends.

8. The Mediator - Obsessively ambivalent; see all points of view; readily replace own wishes with those of others and real goals with essential activities. Tendency to narcotization through food, TV, and drink. Know other people's needs better than their own; tendency to space out, not sure whether want to be here, or not, whether want to be on the team or not. Agreeable; anger comes out in indirect ways. Evolved Nines make excellent peacemakers, counselors, negotiators, achieve well when on track.